Car rides, Air Plane rides, Visitations and Funerals...

Last weekend, we got the soon-to-be expected call that Eric's grandfather had died. The cancer that festered inside his body had finally taken him away from us. Although we were warned, we were somewhat expecting his death, it was still an awful call to get. The wonder, the worry, the overwhelming overflow of memories, explaining to your 2 and 4 year old why we aren't going to see grandpa in his hospital bed any longer. Watching the kids hustle and bustle as they made plans, printed programs, arranged the funeral, and collected pictures and thoughts to share on paper.  It was my assumption as I picked out Avery's funeral appropriate dress with matching coat and hat, and Aden's dress shirt with matching tie that we would drive down as a family, and relax as we greeted those from the community coming to the visitation. I envisioned a tearful funeral, but then a joyous luncheon afterwards where we would visit and share with family from afar, remember grandpa and what his life meant to each and everyone of us.

SCREECHHHHHHHHH (That is the sound of the wheels in my brain coming to a halt! NO SUCH THING WAS ABOUT TO HAPPEN!

The phone is ringing yet again...just 10 minutes after the first call. What???????????? Eric's uncle just died?????? It was Eric's mom, calling to tell us that her brother, Eric's uncle was having a stint put in that day, and the surgery wasn't going well. His organs were shutting down, and the family should RUSH, and I mean RUSH to Colorado if they had any hopes of saying goodbye...

Within minutes of Eric's mom getting that call, she was on the phone with us, crying, that her brother had  indeed just passed...he was gone...and he wanted Eric to do his funeral...

Eric just sat there, eyes big as saucers, neither of us knowing what to say, or what to do. There was so much to do, to plan, no time to think...ponder, or reflect.

Monday my mom and dad came up to give Eric and the kids a hair cut. We went to lunch, we went to the library, we finished packing, made plans with the dog sitters, and then we were off...We reached our hotel in Minnesota, took the kids swimming (an attempt to make the kids think this was a fun time) and woke to our alarms the next morning at 5am. The shuttle rushed Eric to the airport as the kids and I hauled our luggage back to the van. We found a nominal breakfast that the hotel was offering, and hit the freeway while it was still dark...

I kept watching the clock, praying that Eric's plane would be safe, that the pilots would have wisdom while flying my precious husband across the friendly skies. Eric arrived in Texas, on time, took off on time, and arrived in Grand Junction again on time. He was safe, with family, in the mountains. He was there to share the message of hope that is only found in Christ, and to say goodbye to his uncle.

Meanwhile, i was back at home with the kids, packing for the next portion of our week, gathering Aden's school work, rearranging snack day at school, packing and getting ready to go. Thursday morning, we hit the ground running. With $15 left to my name, I hurriedly packed the pb&j sandwiches, string cheese, carrot sticks and juice boxes. We hit the road, up to Minnesota again, rushing to pick up daddy in time. We get there...we park...we hike across the parking lot to the terminal doors, hike across the airport, up two escalators, to baggage claim 10 and check point number 3. Take the kids to the bathroom (avery didn't go even after sitting there for almsot 5 minutes) and then back to our seats to patiently wait for daddy to come home to us. Avery pees........

I lost it! I...was no longer sane, I was no longer concerned with anyone but myself. Super mommy deflated and there I sat...alone...with two kids under the age of 4, one just peed her pants, pale as could be, just over the flu, and the other child so wound up that he was doing summer salts on the dirty airport floor. I glanced at the computer monitor just in time to see a 30 minute delay...oh wait, now it is 45 minutes? Oh, there we go...an HOUR delay?????????? Did I mention that when Eric landed safely in Texas to reach his connecting flight to Minnesota his cell phone died and I had no idea where to meet him when he did land 1 HOUR late????????

"There he is!" I said, excitedly.  We get Eric's bags, rush back down the escalators, back across the airport, across the parking lot to the van. Change Avery's pants, buckle in the kids, shove their snacks in their laps, give each other a kiss, and off we go! Back on to the freeway. What is that? Avery spilled her juice, as we both look back to the back of the van where she sat, I glanced forward just in time to see us pass our exit. You know...the one that takes just just a few miles down the road to 35S. Oh...we are lost, heading North and East, we are stuck. Exit ramps are closed for construction, detours are detouring us where we did not want to tour, and 1 hour later, almost out of gas, we land back on the interstate!

We drive 2.5 hours to the clear lake exit, call a friend to come and gas us up, rush back on to the interstate. Meet my parents in the McDonald's parking lot in story city, exchange cars and children, and peel away as I change into my visitation clothes in the back seat. We get there...we see the urn...we see the family, we take a deep breath. We visit, we cry, we leave...slowly driving back to my mom's to settle the kids into bed wondering...

Was any of this part of God's plan???? Where did we all go wrong? Why death? Why sin? What now?

We made it through the funeral on Friday, and made it back just in time that night to say hello and welcome to our new pastor and his wife. They just moved in that day, and we missed it...

The next morning up at the crack of dawn to get the kids dressed. It was, "Let's get dressed, go outside in the cold, stand for 30 minutes in line, and then walk up and down the streets of town for some free candy" day. We made it through...we were keeping up...

We get home, finish lunch, put the kids down for quiet time, and then we practice our songs for Sunday. We were leading worship and had nothing picked out or planned at that point. At 10:30pm we finished. Sound asleep on our pillows we went.

Up and ready, to church by 8am, practice, sunday school, home for lunch. Youth group until 11pm, then back to sleep on our pillows...

Today...I sit...I think...I write...

No, death was not a part of God's plan. It is icky, it is inconvenient, it causes hurts, problems, a depletion of funds, energy and emotions. It reminds us that this place...full of car rides, air plane rides, visitations and funerals is not our home. THANK GOD!